Dr. Charles Foster has an international reputation as a therapist for individuals, couples, and families and as a consultant for organizations of all sizes. He is co-founder and research director of The Chestnut Hill Institute. And with Mira Kirshenbaum, he is author, co-author, and lead researcher of over thirteen books. He has lectured at the Harvard Medical School and has made numerous TV appearances.
Charles's Latest Blog Entries:
“Trust” finds a home
by Mira and Charles on November 29th, 2011What do you think of this page?
Good news! We now have a webpage for “I Love You but I Don’t Trust You.” Check it out! But I need your help . . .
Please let me know what you think of the page. Are there any tweaks that occur to you? Any info you’d like to see? Any additions or deletions?
For many people, this will be their introduction to the book. Please let me know how you like it. I’d really appreciate hearing your reactions and suggestions. Thanks!!
Gratitude beyond the attitude
by Mira and Charles on November 23rd, 2011What is gratitude without thanking?
We are being told more and more often that gratitude is good for us. Check out, for example, this article in the NYTimes which presents of slew of finding about the mental health benefits of the attitude of gratitude. But I—contrary as usual—am both critical and skeptical about this. The gratitude guys are on the right track, but they’ve got it wrong. Let’s look more closely. Read the rest of this entry. »
Have a really happy family Thanksgiving
by Mira and Charles on November 21st, 2011Tips for preventing a Thanksgiving disaster
It’s a day for thanks. It’s a day for giving. And it’s a day for enjoying and celebrating your family and friends. At least it should be. But too often Thanksgiving is a day marred – destroyed sometimes – by the stress of going overboard, the tension that goes with travel, and by family members acting badly. So sad. Especially when it’s so easy to have a happy Thanksgiving. The rules are few and simple: Read the rest of this entry. »
What to tell, when to tell it
by Mira and Charles on November 18th, 2011Spooling out difficult truths in a new relationship
Here we go again with another entry in our ripped-from-the-headlines series. (We’ve been doing a lot of interviews recently!) This one is about what to tell and when to tell it when you’re just starting out in a new relationship. I know. A scary and confusing issue. Well, here are the rules to keep you sane and keep you out of trouble: Read the rest of this entry. »
Lovers and liars
by Mira and Charles on November 16th, 2011“Who are you, really?”
Weird things happen when people seek a mate. Like, for example, the way honest people turn into liars. A recent article about on-line dating in the Times has the statistic that “about 81 percent of people misrepresent their height, weight or age in their profiles.” And if people are lying about that—so easily disconfirmed!—what else are they lying about? (Answer: Everything!)
Why DO we lie when we’re looking for love, and what does it mean? Read the rest of this entry. »
“How can you love me if you don’t see me?”
by Mira and Charles on November 11th, 2011How to show you really care
Here we go again: ripped from the headlines. This time the issue is why people so often feel unloved, uncared for in relationships. A major general interest magazine asked us for tips. Here’s what we said, then what happened when they asked us to support our advice: Read the rest of this entry. »
To Swing or Not to Swing
by Mira and Charles on November 7th, 2011Are spouse swapping and multiple relationships ever a good idea?
Here we go again, another in the ripped-from-the-headlines series. This time my mind was blown when a writer from what used to be a very traditional woman’s magazine hit me with questions about swinging and swapping. I don’t know what will end up in the magazine piece, but here’s the raw Q and A. Let’s have at it!: Read the rest of this entry. »
Friends vs. Husbands
by Mira and Charles on November 2nd, 2011Are women choosing friends over husbands?
Another in our ripped-from-the-headlines series. Bogus trend alert: while this may be a big issue, it is not necessarily a big new trend. Anyway, as you may well know from your own life, there are a lot of women who are putting their marriages in jeopardy by prioritizing their friends and continuing their single life despite being in a relationship. After all, people are often out partying with work colleagues, catching up with friends, going to the gym etc., and their spouses can often feel neglected.
We’ve been quoted on this before. Here’s the Q and A from the journalist’s interview with us: Read the rest of this entry. »
I Love You but I Don’t Trust You, pt. 3
by Mira and Charles on October 31st, 2011From Chap. 1 of our new book, continued
OK, guys, here’s the final installment of a three-part excerpt from Chap. 1, just to give you just a quick, early taste of our new book on restoring trust in relationships. You’ll find the first installment here, and the second here. To catch you up, Heather had discovered her husband had betrayed her, and her friends had come together to support and advise her. Most were saying, hey, it’s over, but one, Nicole, had gone through something like this before and had some very encouraging things to say. The point is: Hope makes sense.
From Chap. 1, continued: Read the rest of this entry. »
I Love You but I Don’t Trust You, pt. 2
by Mira and Charles on October 29th, 2011From Chap. 1 of our new book, continued
Here’s part two of a three-part excerpt from Chap. 1, just to give you just a quick, early taste of our new book on restoring trust in relationships. As you may remember (click here to refresh your memory), Heather had just discovered that her husband had betrayed her. Her friends had come together to support and advise her. Read the rest of this entry. »
