The secret for finding true love
by Mira and Charles on December 30th, 2011There are few things we get asked about more often: “What was that wonderful thing you wrote about finding true love …?” Well, this is the perfect time to bring that out here. The holiday season is exactly when so many relationships take a turn, sometimes ending (painfully but, we hope, wisely), sometimes moving toward commitment (also, we hope, wisely). This is a great time to help people avoid a terrible mistake. And so here is the secret for finding true love…
It appears at the very beginning of our book Women & Love. It’s designed to answer the question, What makes love good?
Here’s the answer:
- It’s not just how you feel about him. It’s much more how he makes you feel about yourself.
- It’s not about losing yourself in him. It’s about becoming true to yourself with him.
- It’s not about how great he is. It’s about how great you can become alongside of him.
- It’s not about how much you love him. It’s about how he helps you love yourself.
- It’s not just about his finding room in his heart for you. It’s about his finding room in his life for your energy, drive, ambition, passions, and interests.
- It’s not just about how good he is deep down. It’s about how much you experience his goodness as you live your life together.
- It’s not about how he makes you hungry to be with him. It’s about how much he makes you feel at home when you are with him.
- It’s not about the love you share. It’s about your ability to fully, equally, deeply share your life together.
- It’s about falling in like.
Please, I beg you: take this seriously. Life is too short for you to shortchange yourself. It’s too short for you to accept counterfeit love when you could get the real thing.
Now because this is so important, we’re going to have a series of blogs, one on each of these guidelines. Look for it here!
