What do people think of our trust book?
by Mira and Charles on October 12th, 2011First responses to “I Love You but I Don’t Trust You”
We sent out pre-publication copies of our new book to a variety of well known experts to get their reactions to it. Curious about what they said? Here, unedited, are their comments:
1) “If you’ve ever suffered through the shock and agony of a loved one’s betrayal and have spent sleepless nights wondering whether your broken relationship can ever be healed, you should read this profoundly helpful and hopeful book. With her usual skill, insight and humor, Mira Kirshenbaum cuts to the heart of the matter. “You can’t have love without trust,” she writes–and although some relationships don’t survive a betrayal, many can and do. Kirshenbaum’s clear-eyed, heartfelt, and down-to-earth advice is a blueprint for how to heal the pain of a betrayal, restore lost trust to your relationship and make it stronger and better than ever before.”
Diane Guernsey, executive editor of the online magazine Pulse–voices from the heart of medicine, www.pulsemagazine.org; former senior editor/contributor at Town and Country
2) “This book, based on so much experience and wisdom, will be tremendously useful for millions of people in relationships where trust has been damaged. I found important insights and suggestions everywhere.”
Pepper Schwartz, author of Love Between Equals
3) “A lack of trust undermines all relationships and leaves people feeling lonely and disconnected. If you want to find your way back to the people you love, this book is a must read. It offers a step-by-step map for rebuilding trust and helping you find peace within.”
Michele Weiner-Davis, author of Divorce Busting
4) “Mira Kirshenbaum gives us hope when the inevitable crises of betrayal besiege our very most important relationships. With profound clarity and sensitivity, she guides us on a path toward surprisingly effective healing. Mira writes for those whose hopes for truly trusting relationships has been shattered by our straying–she writes for us all.”
Rabbi Ted Falcon, PhD, spiritual therapist and co-author Getting to the Heart of Interfaith and Religion Gone Astray
5) “In ‘I Love You but I Don’t Trust You’ Mira Kirshenbaum’s life long insights about trust in relationships come alive. This practical and helpful book, a complete guide to rebuilding damaged trust is a significant contribution. Kirshenbaum shows us how hurts and challenges people struggle with can be overcome. A convincingly hopeful book to overcome despair of mistrust.”
Eva Fogelman, PhD, author of the Pulitzer Prize nominee Conscience And Courage: Rescuers of Jews During the Holocaust, and writer and co-producer of Breaking the Silence: The Generation After the Holocaust.
6) “Mira Kirshenbaum has hit the nail on the head…again! She is a steady guide through the muddy waters of heartbreak and betrayal, offering sound strategies for making good decisions in tough times. The process of restoring trust is not an easy one, but one well worth pursuing. This book will help lead the way.”
Dr. Dorothy Firman, author of Brace for Impact: Miracle on the Hudson Survivors Share Their Stories of Near Death and Hope for New Life and the forthcoming Engaging Life: Living Well with Chronic Illness. Dr. Firman has a blog (Life on Purpose) on psychologytoday.com.
7) “A path breaking book on restoring trust in relationships. A wonderful read based on deeply felt experiences.”
Janis Abrahms Spring, Ph.D., author of How Can I Forgive You? The Courage to Forgive, The Freedom Not To
“This practical must read book is for anyone who has ever suffered the hurt and pain of mistrust. Mira Kirshenbaum, psychotherapist and author of eleven books, wisely takes you on a journey exploring the difficulties of betrayal, suspicion and harmful mistakes. Kirshenbaum’s gifted insights are profound and they show you how to restore trust with your closest loved ones.”
Lee Raffel, M.S.W., author of I Hate Conflict! Seven Steps to Resolving Differences with Anyone in Your Life.
9) “Mira’s latest book is a page-turner because of her use of real-life case studies that allow readers to learn from others’ mistakes. “I Love You But I Don’t Trust You” is not just about recovering from infidelity, but is relevant for anyone who has been deeply wronged. Mira has a brilliant ability to teach people how to approach each other in ways that are minimally inflammatory in what is otherwise an emotional minefield.”
Val Jones, M.D., award-winning writer and CEO of Better Health (www.getbetterhealth.com)
10) “Mira Kirshenbaum has hit another one out of the park. Kirshenbaum breaks down the way trust erodes into manageable pieces, exploring the space between all-or-nothing thinking and the reality that life is rarely that clear cut. Her no-nonsense approach offers thoughtful, practical step-by-step methods to assess whether and how to rebuild the trust in your relationship. What I admire most about her work is that she’s able to take an abstract concept like trust and break it down into its most basic components, which makes it so easy to understand. As a result, her examples and explanations offer readers crystal clear insight into how to set their internal compass and move forward in a healthy, thoughtful way. Our client library bookshelves are full of her books, which are perennial favorites with clients.”
Diana Mercer, J.D., co-author, Making Divorce Work (Perigee 2010) and Your Divorce Advisor (Fireside 2001).
11) “Mira Kirshenbaum has once again addressed a crucial factor in maintaining a long lasting intimate love relationship. “I Love You, but I Don’t Trust You” takes the reader on a journey that provides in depth understanding of how we are affected when trust is broken and how we can heal and grow stronger when our hearts are shattered. Mira’s provides deep-felt understanding of the various ways trust can be violated and most importantly she lends her years of personal and professional experience to us by providing the courageous path whereby both parties can emerge whole and with a deeper commitment and understanding of each other. Mira has written so many compelling books that have guided thousands to better relationships, this is yet another contribution to the library of anyone who longs for intimacy and has not known how to keep it alive in the face of a trust broken”
Arthur P. Ciaramicoli, Ed.D.,Ph.D., Author of The Power of Empathy, Performance Addiction and The Curse of the Capable.
12) “As a man I found I LOVE YOU BUT I DON’T TRUST YOU to be a real eye-opener. That’s because I was able to recognize many subtle and blatant mistakes I’ve made with trust issues in my own relationships. Whether it’s my own life or the lives of others that I advise, it’s often hard for a guy to say and do the right things in order to gain a woman’s complete trust. I usually figured like many other men that if you sincerely say that you’re sorry for mistakes that everything would be okay afterwards. But after reading this book, I’ve found that there is much more to understand about genuine trust. I think that Kirshenbaum has done a fantastic job of showing both men and women precisely what to say and do in order to establish and maintain the kind of trust that makes for outstanding romantic love relationships. This book is definitely one that every couple needs on their bookshelf to refer to often because a big mistake in this area may destroy a once-great love forever!”
Steve Nakamoto, author of Men Are Like Fish and Talk Like A Winner!
13) “Mira Kirshenbaum’s compelling new book will lower the divorce rate in this country! ‘I Love You But I Don’t Trust You’ is full of stories of betrayal and disappointment, all too familiar in this complex world. Mira’s sensitive storytelling lets us see how our own situations relate to so many others. The author gives brave advice for overcoming the devastating effects of betrayed trust, and gives hope that we actually might be able to salvage and repair important relationships, or at least know that we have choices we can make. Thank you for this much needed guidebook to trust–the essential building block of all relationships.”
Carol Evans, President, Working Mother Media
Well, there you have it. I am very moved and grateful for such enthusiastic comments. You can pre-order “I Love You but I Don’t Trust You” now: that way you’ll get your copy the moment it comes out (and you won’t be charged until then!).
