Reader response to Why happiness = being happily married

Well, we got a lot of emails from you guys about the previous blog.  Mostly appreciative, although one lady asked why we have to mention our books at every opportunity.  (Answer: because they help people.)  Anyway, you had two main questions that really deserve answers:

Are you saying that you have to be married to be happy?  NO!  First of all, the data is general.  For certain individuals, marriage is not the best thing.  And many of these are female individuals.  In spite of the energy the media would have us think women put into getting married (as if women were marriage-obsessed idiots!), in fact marriage is more stressful for women than being single.  Here’s the key: do what’s right for you, but just don’t neglect the contribution a good marriage can make to your happiness.  If you’re a single guy, don’t assume that your blissful freedom buys you as much happiness as you think.  Anyway, it’s not about being married; it’s about being happily married: that’s where you get the big bump up in happiness. 

Are you saying that if you’re not happily married you’re doomed?  NO!  You’re not doomed because you’re not doomed to being unhappily married.  This is one way in which things are much better today than at any time in the past.  You can get out of an unhappy marriage much more easily than ever before.  We know more about how to repair a broken marriage than ever before.  We know more about how to choose the right partner than ever before.  We just don’t have to feel stuck in an unhappy marriage the way it used to be the case. 

Our point is simply this:  Because the connection between happiness and being happily married is so strong, take this seriously.  That’s all we’re asking.  The time you spend making sure your marriage is strong and healthy is the best investment in your happiness that you can make.  If you make being happily married a priority, you will have big payoff. 

Now go read one of our books!  And if you need help, get it!

Thanks for reaching out to us. 

Posted: Thursday, April 1st, 2010 at 1:35 pm
Category: Relationships, News & Notes, Emotional Energy, Decision Making, Uncategorized
Author: Mira and Charles
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